


Don't Threaten Me With A Good Time

by miss_grey



Series: What We Do In The Dark [1]
Category: Band of Brothers
Genre: Blood Drinking, F/M, M/M, Sexual Tension, Slow Burn, Supernatural AU - Freeform, Unresolved Sexual Tension, Vampire Hunters, a lot of sexual innuendo, dick and lipton are hunters, nix makes dick blush, vampire nix, violence against vampires
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2019-05-20
Updated: 2019-05-20
Packaged: 2020-03-08 10:04:37
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 2,813
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/18892420
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/miss_grey/pseuds/miss_grey
Summary: Dick and Lipton are hunters, and they received a tip about a vampire nest that they intend to take out.  Only, they find something more than they expected.Or: Dick and Nix meet for the first time.





	Don't Threaten Me With A Good Time

**Author's Note:**

> This is the first part of a new series I'm doing that will feature the boys as supernatural creatures. The series will contain Nixon/Winters, Babe/Roe, and Speirs/Lipton. 
> 
> As always, this fic depicts the characters from the HBO series Band of Brothers, and no disrespect is meant toward the real men.

 

 

“Are you sure this is the place?”  Lipton asked, checking over the map again.

Dick tapped his finger, just once, on the steering wheel and nodded in confirmation.  “This is it.  I confirmed the intel with Harry two days ago.”

“It’s just… it’s a night club.”

“Yeah,” Dick said, undoing his seat belt, “perfect place for vamps to operate, don’t you think?”

“Yeah, I suppose.”  Lipton nodded and reached into the backseat for his duffle full of supplies.  “Not very classy of them, though,” He grumbled.  He fished out some of his favorite weapons.  “So, are we ready, then?”

“Sure.”  The sun was just peeking over the horizon, after all.  The vampires would already be tucked away in their coffins.  All they had to do was get in, do their business, and then they’d be out before the general morning commute.  While Dick had all the confidence in the world in the righteousness of his work, the life of a hunter was hard, and unfortunately, police officers weren’t usually very understanding when they caught you fleeing the scene of a crime, covered in blood.  Undead blood or not.  So, better to get it done right.  “Let’s go.”

Lipton took up his usually position guarding Dick’s back as they hurried across the parking lot and up to the back door, which was locked.  Luckily, however, Dick had been teaching himself to pick locks in his free time and he was able to get it open in less than two minutes.

They pushed the door open then shut it quietly behind them.  Dick led the way, stake and silver crucifix in his hands, bottles of holy water strapped to his belt.  Lipton followed behind him, bearing another stake and a machete.  Harry’s tip had been rather vague—he’d said at least three vamps, and up to five, so they needed to be ready for anything.

The club looked like what Dick imagined most did—dark upholstery and fixtures, large heavy bar, tables scattered around, a general seedy atmosphere.  The only thing that perhaps set this place apart were the small, curtained alcoves off to the sides—prime feeding locations for the vamp on the prowl.  It made Dick sick, it really did.  But the place was spotless—if it wasn’t for their intel, he never would’ve guessed the place was a vampire den—there wasn’t a spot of blood to be found.

The place was silent as a grave as they made their way through the main rooms, the kitchen, a couple offices, and then downstairs.  In the basement, tucked neatly behind shelves full of alcohol, they found three coffins, gleaming dully in the fluorescent overhead lights that Lip had flicked on as they’d descended.  It was almost too easy.

“You ready?”  Lip mouthed, as he approached the coffin on the far right.

Dick nodded and, slowly, reached forward to lift the lid of the coffin.  Inside was a middle aged man with dark hair that was just starting to go gray at the temples.  His arms lay conveniently at his sides.  Dick glanced at Lip briefly, then raised his stake and without a second thought, plunged it into the heart of the sleeping vampire.  It’s eyes flew open, bright green, and he gasped, reaching for Dick, just a moment before he turned to ash.  To his right, he heard a gurgle and Lip stepped back from his own kill.  One left. 

They approached the third coffin together and Dick opened it, Lipton standing ready at his side.  Inside the last coffin lay a beautiful woman with flowing golden locks and a smooth countenance, and he almost felt a moment of regret before he stabbed her through the heart as well, and watched as she turned to ash before him.

“That felt too easy,” Lip whispered at his back.

Dick shrugged.  “They were obviously pretty comfortable here.  I mean, they had a steady stream of victims pouring in every night.  But no more.”

“Right.”  Lipton shifted his bag on his shoulder.  “Let’s get out of here before it gets any later.”

As they made their way back up the stairs, and through the main room of the club, Lipton felt a slight tingle go up his spine, almost like… he could hear something, just at the edge of his senses.  They were nearly to the kitchen when he tapped Dick on the shoulder and motioned for him to stop and listen.

They stood there for almost twenty seconds before Dick’s ears also caught it.  It was… moaning.  Heavy, breathy moaning.  A woman’s voice, gasping:  “Fuck.  God, yes,” and then “more.  More.”  A moment later, a man’s voice joined in.  And then… another voice?

“What the hell?”  Dick whispered.

“Maybe the management?  Or…some of the patrons?”  Lip suggested.

“Let’s go see.”

In the corner of the kitchen, near the door, they found a narrow staircase that led upstairs to an equally narrow hallway.  The top floor wasn’t very impressive—old green carpeting and three doors.  One stood open to a hallway bathroom.  The one across from it revealed a supply closet when Lip carefully turned the knob.  The third door stood closed at the end of the hallway.  From behind it, they could hear continued moans from at least three people and what sounded like a _very_ vigorous sex session. 

“Be ready,” Dick mouthed before he stalked down the hallway, silent and efficient, until he stood directly in front of the door.  He placed his hand on the knob and twisted, silently, then pushed the door open without even a squeak, to peek inside.

A giant mattress sat in the center of the floor, draped in sheets and dark pillows that spilled off the sides, and atop it lay three women and one man, who wound around each other sinuously, legs intertwined, eyes closed, heads thrown back in ecstasy.  The only light came from a single lamp in the corner of the room, and it cast the writhing bodies with a dim golden glow.  For a moment, Dick found himself completely caught up in the scene—he watched the man pull one of the women down to him and kiss her lips, then trail his mouth down to her neck, while another hand fondled the naked breast of another woman.  He wasn’t sure which horrified him more—the sheer excess and perversion of what he was witnessing, or the fact that these people had continued to do… _this_ while he and his partner had been downstairs killing vampires. 

Suddenly, it was too much.  The moaning, the heat, the closeness of the room, the sun rising outside the darkened window.  “Enough!”  Dick was startled to realize the shout had come from him, and the other occupants of the room were startled as well.  The three women shrieked and leapt away from the man, though his pale arms continued to reach for them, beckoning.  “This establishment is closed!”  Dick shouted.

“Grab your clothes, ladies!”  Lipton called from behind Dick’s shoulder as the women rushed past him.

But Dick’s eyes were focused on the man who now lay sprawled, alone, on the mattress, cushioned by at least a dozen dark pillows.  He had dark, messy hair, spread across a pillow and matted in curls on his pale forehead.  Thick, dark brows topped wide, dark, drugged-looking eyes.  The man’s body was pale and relatively compact, lean with the exception of a sort of softness to his middle, and his face, which still looked very young.  And, stranger still, the man was wearing pants, so… whatever Dick had thought he was doing, he must have been mistaken.  Dick was just about to retreat, taken aback by his discovery, when the young man on the mattress sat up and grinned at Dick, his sharp white teeth smeared with red.  “Hey there, fella,” the man slurred, “there’s enough to go around, if you’re interested.  You didn’t have to chase all my company away.”

Dick felt ice go down his spine.  This man was a vampire.  And he was awake.  Freshly fed.  They hadn’t prepared for this.  Behind him, he heard Lip shift and close the door.Dick dared not take his eyes off the vamp, who still continued to grin at him, hand beckoning.

Dick gripped his stake and leapt forward toward the vamp, pinning him easily to the mattress.  “Whoa, Red,” the vampire gasped, “take it easy.  I’m an equal opportunity kind of guy.  I’m not going anywhere.”

“Stop talking.”  Dick ordered.  He straddled the vampire, holding the vamp’s right arm down with his left, and poising the stake over the vamp’s heart with the other.

“Fuck,” the vampire hissed, and this close up, Dick could see that he had wide, chocolate eyes, and the blood lust was quickly fading from them as he realized his current predicament.  “You’re hunters.”

“Yeah, we’re hunters.”  Dick growled.  “How many of you are there?”

The vampire still managed to shrug under Dick’s weight and the threat of a stake.  “In the building?  I dunno.  The three that own the place sleep downstairs.”

“Already taken care of,” Dick snarled.  “Why weren’t you downstairs?  It’s dawn.  The sun’s coming up.”

The vampire actually chuckled.  “What can I say?  I’m a rebel.  I like to stay out late.”

“Are there others?  Will more come looking for all of you?”

Again, the vampire shrugged, and Dick watched his throat bob.  He’d never been this close to a waking vampire.  “Sure, there are others.  Probably not here right now, though.  And yeah, they’ll probably come looking if we all wind up dusted.”  He grinned lopsidedly.  “But what does it matter?  I won’t care, because I’ll be gone, and I won’t be able to give anyone your description.”  Suddenly, the vampire raised his free hand and stroked it down Dick’s arm that held the stake.  “So go ahead, Red.  Might as well get it over with.”

Dick frowned.  “You’re not even going to try to fight me?”

The vampire snorted.  “What’s the use?  You seem very competent and you also have back up.  I’m currently high as a fucking kite.”  He moaned.  “It was good, tonight.  Those girls were something sweet.”  He chuckled.  “Bet you’d be even sweeter, though, Red.”

“Stop that.”  Dick ordered, flushing involuntarily.  He’d killed more than a dozen vampires in his time, but none had ever tried to flirt their way out of their demise before.

“Make me,” the vampire purred.

“Dick…just stab him,” Lip commented from behind him, “it’s getting weird.”

“Tell me about it,” Dick muttered, and yet, he couldn’t seem to make his arm move.  Instead, he stared into the face of the vampire, completely caught up in his eyes for a moment, before he flicked his own down to the vampire’s plush red lips before meeting his eyes again.  “How many have you killed?”  He asked.

The vampire smirked.  “Oh, a few.  But lately?  None.  Seem to have lost my appetite for murder.  Sure disappointed my coven, let me tell you.  They kicked me out and everything.  But sadly, I’ve continued down that road.  I drink from willing humans now.  Like all of those lovely women you unceremoniously threw out.”

“You’re telling me they willingly let you feed from them?”

“Oh.  Yes.  Definitely.”  The man sucked on his lower lip for just a moment, before releasing it.

“Why would they do that?”  Dick asked, horrified by the thought.

“It feels good.  Just a little sip, here and there, shared amongst many.  They get a little high.  I get a little high.  Want me to show you?”

Dick sucked in a breath, but he still couldn’t seem to make his hand move.  “Oh, God.”  He murmured, realization hitting him.  “You’re hypnotizing me, aren’t you?”

The vampire chuckled, and licked his lips.  “Oh, if only.  What’s your name?”

“Dick Winters.”

“Dick.”  The vampire shifted his hips so that they rubbed against Dick’s.  “Pleasure to meet you.  I’m Lewis Nixon.”  He traced his hand along Dick’s skin again and Dick felt goosebumps rise along his arm.  “If you wanna stick around, I could show you a good time.  You can even keep your weapons—it’s kind of sexy, if I’m being honest.”  Dick felt a blush spread over his neck.  “If you’re going to kill me, though, you should probably get on with it.”

Dick suddenly felt very confused.  Behind him, Lip shifted impatiently again.   “Do it, Dick.  We’ve already been here too long.  Somebody’s gonna notice the car.”

“Oh, I doubt it,” Nixon drawled.  “Not many come around this way unless it’s intentional.”

“Shut up,” Dick hissed.  “Why are you…why are you like this?  Why don’t you just… I don’t know?  Use your strength to throw me off?”

Nixon smirked.  “First of all, I quite like you where you’re at right now, if I’m being honest.  This whole encounter is definitely the hottest thing to happen to me in this decade.  Secondly, if I threw you off, I’d probably hurt you, and then your friend would attack, and it’d be a blood bath, and really, I just don’t have the stomach for that anymore, like I said.  And finally, I’m curious to see what you’re going to do.”

“Don’t you have any sense of preservation?”  Dick demanded.

“Apparently not.”  Nixon rolled his eyes and shifted again, so that Dick could feel the smooth coolness of the vampire’s skin ghost against his own.  “Look, so long as we’re being honest here, I’m bored.  It’s all just sleep late, wake up, flirt, drink, get a good high going, talk with people I haven’t liked in years, avoid any real responsibility, pass out, then do it again.  So if you kill me, it won’t be too much of a tragedy.”

“Jesus.”  Dick muttered.  The vampire seemed to have a death wish.  “And if I spare you?”

“Well, that _would_ be very interesting.  Surprising, even.  You don’t seem like the kind of man to compromise your morals.”

“I’m not.”

“So why are you acting like I might be an exception?”  Nixon chuckled again.  “Thinking of taking me up on my offer?  I promise I’ll be a good boy, Red.  You could even tie me up if you want.  God, I haven’t had a good bondage session in years.”

“Oh my God,” Dick swore again, and he finally pushed himself away from the vampire.  Dick couldn’t stand being that close to him any longer.  He was…frustrating.  And sinful.  Evil.  He was _pure evil._ Nixon, now freed, pushed himself up to a sitting position.  “This is what you do, isn’t it?  You charm humans and they fall into your bed?”  Dick demanded.

“Is it working?  Seriously, Dick, I’d only take a sip, and only if you wanted it.  If not, I’d be good.  I promise.”

“Dick,” Lipton huffed from behind them, “I cannot believe this vampire is propositioning you right now.  What is this?  _Really?_ ”

“You’re going to let me live, aren’t you?”  Nixon asked.

Dick shook his head and stood up.  “I can’t even believe I’m considering it.  You’re a vampire.  But… you’re just so….”  Dick shrugged, helpless.  “Pathetic.”  He huffed.  “Even so, you’ll probably tell your friends about this, and then you’ll hunt us down and try to kill us.”

Nixon pretended to wince.  “Ouch, okay.  Pathetic, huh?  Well, I guess you’re right.  I don’t have any friends, and if I’m not wrong, you just killed the only acquaintances I had in the area.  So I wouldn’t bet on anyone coming after you.  Plus, you know, I wasn’t kidding about showing you a good time.”  Nixon quirked a brow.  “I’d settle for even a kiss, but alas, I doubt you’d be willing.  You’re a man of principle, after all.”

“I am.”  Dick cleared his throat.  “And if you so much as hurt a fly, we’ll be back, and I’ll kill you next time.”  Dick took a step backward toward the door.  “Come on, Lip, let’s go.”

“We’re letting him live?!”  Lip demanded, incredulous.

“For now.”  And with that, Dick shoved Lipton backward through the door, and then they were hauling ass through the club until they burst into the sunlight.  They threw their stuff into the car and Dick slid smoothly behind the wheel.

They were on the highway again before Lip finally cleared his throat and said “Would you please tell me what the fuck that was all about?”

“I don’t know.  It just… didn’t feel right.”

“He really threw you off your game when he flirted with you, didn’t he?  God, did he really hypnotize you?”

“I don’t know.  I don’t think so, at least.  Maybe?”  Dick clenched the steering wheel tighter.  “It’s too late now, anyway.”

“What if he does tell his friends and they come after us?”

“Well, it’ll be hours before any of them can hit the road, and by then we’ll be far away from here.  Let ‘em try.”

**Author's Note:**

> I hope you all enjoy, and feedback is always welcome. If you want, you can find me on tumblr as @realhunterswearplaid.

**Works inspired by this one:**

  * [Don't Threaten Me](https://archiveofourown.org/works/21199745) by [Lysel](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lysel/pseuds/Lysel)
  * [Cover #1: "What We Do In The Dark"](https://archiveofourown.org/works/21435496) by [Zoroastre](https://archiveofourown.org/users/Zoroastre/pseuds/Zoroastre)




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